Drug jokes

What do you call a couple Mexicans getting stoned in a bush? Buches baked breans.

A Mexican opens a pharmacy in CA. What’s he selling?

Drugs.

My cow just wandered into a field of marijuana. The steaks have never been so high...

What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer? A hooker can wash her crack and resell it.

If there was someone selling drugs around here, we'd know.

I bought shoes from a drug dealer yesterday. I don't know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day.

My life.

What do you call a restaurant that sells food that contains weed?

McBongald's.

What is the difference between American teenage girls and Muslim teenage girls? -- American teenage girls get stoned *before* they have sex.

Today my stoner friend used my to-do list as a blunt wrap.

He was high on my list of priorities.

"Dad, how do stars die?" -- "Usually an overdose."

What do you call someone with Down Syndrome who smokes weed?

A baked potato.

How does a prostitute make more than a drug dealer?

Because she can clean her crack and sell it again.

What do Colorado and Saudi Arabia have in common?

It's legal to get stoned.