After a long day of work, Kanye West goes to his Kanye Nest to take his Kanye Rest. He wakes up feeling his Kanye Best. Then he’ll get Kanye Dressed on his Kanye Vest to go on a Kanye Quest. He goes to church and becomes Kanye Blessed, then to a hotel room to be a Kanye Guest.
What did the mayonnaise say when the refrigerator door was opened? Close the door, I'm dressing.
I was watching the London Marathon one year, and I saw two runners in costumes. One of them was dressed a chicken and the other dressed as an egg. I thought: 'This'll be interesting.'.
What is the weirdest thing to wear and what is weirdest thing to say. Weirdest thing to ware: Socks with sandals, also with flip flops! Weirdest thing to say: "Would you rather be a bath or a toilet?" "The blue angel sea slug looks like an alien." (weird). Bonus: Things to ware with other things: Crop top with t-shirt(really hip), Crop top with tights or shorts, dresses with tights! (Cool) Oh well byeeeeeee!
A girl named Kariah was at a night club, she was twerking and shaking but she was just there for fun with her friends will untill some guy name Jaden came up to her and started flirting with her. Jaden: WOW Girl! Kariah: What? Jaden: Its just that a sexy girl like you should be haveing sex not begging for sex! Kariah: Okay listen pimp I don't know who you are but I don't want you around me one bit! Jaden grabbed her hips with such FORCE! Jaden: Come on lets go somewhere...priviet! and have a good time a fun time! Kariah slaped him and left the night club telling her friends she was gone. Leaving a tip for the drinks she bought. Daina: Hey whats wrong? Mary: Yeah! Greg: Sweetie...tell us. Ariana: Come on...did some one try to touch you in a weird way?! Kariah wanted to tell them but couldn't it was to personal. Kariah: Uh I have to go...its way passed my curfew! Love you! Kariah sighed, and waited for a cab down by Heyo street. Then a cab man started dirty talking her...DIRTY! Cab man: Hey, sexy lady! where are you going?...need a...wow...whoohoo...dang...ride? Kariah rolled her eyes then stuck her tongue out at the cab man. This fucking cab men said this. Cab man: Ooooo...use that for the sex! Kariah: I don't think so! Cab man: ha uh ha... I see the way your looking at me I know you like me! Kariah walks away from him and finds another cab but the cab man did not take her mean talk and weird silents for an answer. instead the cab man got out of is "Cab" and harrowed around her. Cab man: HEY WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU GOING!?Kariah: TO MY KIDS AND MY HUSBAN! SO GET LOST BITCH!!!! You see Kariah was married, she just came to be with her friends at a night club. Cab man gets close to her so she ran...she ran as fast as she could till she triped on her high heels, once the cab man got close to her he picked her up...I think you know what he did okay I'll tell you. Cab man picked her up and took her back to the cab a.k.a taxi of course she was not gonna give up without a fight...will she gave up! Cab man: I know ya like me! I just know it! You dressed up in a hoochie and sluty dress for nothing will wrong you LIKE ME maybe love if we get lucky! He drove her to his house and then took off is cloths "underware included" got on top of her and "Rape was born again". Kariah did not remember a thing that night only that she was forced agianst her will too will have "S.E.X"
Dad: Come on David go dress up like a girl
David: Isn't that illegal
Dad: Na it isn't illegal if you keep the buttons in
David: I hate my Life
What did the cucumber say to the bell pepper that wasn't wearing enough clothes?
You need more dressing.
I tried to dress hot so my boyfriend would cast some attention upon me but it just made him sweat.
my mom told me to get dress and i said for we are going to the rodeo
This dude right here don't look nothing like no damn tyrese gibson. He look like a hot fishy tail termite all dress in green makeup.
A sailor drops anchor in a port and heads into the nearest pub. Everyone in the pub is whispering and pointing at him because of his odd shaped body; he has a very muscular body, but a very tiny head on his shoulders. As he orders his drink, he tells the bartender, "I'll explain. I get this in every port and town I visit. I caught a mermaid and she granted me three wishes if I would release her back into the sea. So I told her I wanted a yacht and, sure enough, she came through for me. Next, I asked for a million bucks and now I am set for life. Last of all, I asked her if I could have sex with her and her response was, 'I don't know how you can make love to me with your type of body.' So I asked her, 'How about a little head?'"
Other jokes:
1. Why did the ketchup blush? He saw the salad dressing.
2. What did the elephant ask the naked man? How do you breathe out of that thing?
3. How do you make your husband scream during sex? Call him and let him hear it.
4. Why does the mermaid wear seashells? She outgrew her b-shells!
5. How is life like toilet paper? You’re either on a roll or taking shit from someone.
6. What does one boob say to the other boob? If we don’t get support, people will think we’re nuts.
7. What’s the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball? A man will actually search for a golf ball.
8. What did Cinderella do when she arrived at the ball? She gagged.
What does a rain cloud wear under her dress
Thunderwear
why did the orange start blushing?......because it saw the salad dressing!
HAHFUHODHDOUSAOIFHdn
what did the salad dressing say to the tomato? Don't look I'm Dressing!
Yo mama so ugly people dress up as her at holloween
Why did ranch tell fridge to close the door-------------------------he was dressing
Boyscout.. - a kid who dressed like an idiot.. - An idiot who dressed like a kid
"Mommy, mommy, where's my school dress...ewww!" "Shut up and leave the bedroom."
So me and my friend dressed as dead people for halloween only difference in costume was he was dead
Dad: how was your trip to the park? Daughter: it was good until the man came along. Dad: *gasps* whatever happened, it wasn't your fault, but tell Daddy, what happened? Daughter: he made my friends go away so it was just me and him... then he took my dress off... Dad: oh God, what next? Daughter: Nothing, that was it. Dad: oh, come on! that wasn't exciting, make something up!
