DoS jokes
What do you call two female lovers spying on the government?
Lesbionage.
Roses are red, eggs come in a dozen, do I need to revive Hitler to teach you how to use a goddamn oven?
What did the elephant say to the naked man?
"How do you breathe through something so small?"
What’s worse than George Bush doing 9/11? Jeffrey Epstein doing nine Elevens.
Q: Do you know why transgender people are good at being carpenters?
A: Because they have more experience cutting off their wood.
Memes
What did the cannibal do after he dumped his wife?
He wiped.
A depressed man buys a gun for suicide, but then thinks, "maybe I shouldn't be doing this," and asks a friend for help. He returns with a rope.
Do you have a shovel? Because I'm digging that ass.
What do you call it when two transgender midgets have sex?
And microtransaction.
What do Drake and math have in common? They’re both hard for kids.
Where do poor Italians live?
The spaghetto.
What do alcoholics and necrophiliacs have in common?
They both like cracking open a cold one.
What do cheap hotels and designer jeans have in common?
No ballroom.
Don't do suicide shit. Nearly killed me, tbh. 🙏🙏🙏🙏
How do parents punish a blind kid? They rearrange the furniture.
what do you call a flat road named after George Floyd?
Flat neck road.
Lemme treat you like I treat my homework: slam you on my desk and do you all night.
My mom asks, "How did you do this?" Me: "Naw, I did it with a fork. WHAT D'YA THINK?-"
What do you call Adolf Hitler in a pool? Adolfin.
My wife cheated on me with my brother.
She didn't have a sister, so I improvised, and now all I have to do is wait nine months for one to come.