DoS jokes

What do cheap hotels and designer jeans have in common?

No ballroom.

Don't do suicide shit. Nearly killed me, tbh. 🙏🙏🙏🙏

How do parents punish a blind kid? They rearrange the furniture.

what do you call a flat road named after George Floyd?

Flat neck road.

Lemme treat you like I treat my homework: slam you on my desk and do you all night.

My mom asks, "How did you do this?" Me: "Naw, I did it with a fork. WHAT D'YA THINK?-"

What do you call Adolf Hitler in a pool? Adolfin.

My wife cheated on me with my brother.

She didn't have a sister, so I improvised, and now all I have to do is wait nine months for one to come.

Do you get jealous of your clothes when they hang from the line?

So, there was this girl on the street that had no arms or legs, that said "Hey sir, I've never been fucked before, will you do the honors and fuck me?" So, I threw her in the ocean and said "Well, your fucked now."

How do you get an emo kid to jump?

A bridge.

What did the clock do when it was hungry? It went back four seconds.

Fatty told Skinny, "Do you have any food? My stomach is empty and I haven't eaten."

Skinny replied to Fatty, "Well, doesn't seem like you need food, you ate the whole universe instead!"

What do you call a kid with Down syndrome on the beach?

A baked potato.

Why do kids prefer to spend more time with their dad than their mom?

They already know that their dad is gonna get "Milk" and never return.

I have been thinking about suicide lately. I mean, hey, my mom tells me I can do anything I put my mind to.

What do a relationship and suicidal thought have in common? They’ll both end soon.

What do you call a cleaning skeleton?

The Grim Sweeper.

What do you get when King Kong steps on Batman and Robin?

Flatman and Ribbon.

Why do animals in polar regions have thick fur? Because they don't have a barber! 🤣 🤣 🤣