DoS

DoS jokes

Lover

What do you call two female lovers spying on the government?

Lesbionage.

Priest

A priest walks into a wine store.

"Do you have any 10-year-olds?" Seller: "What the f- Oh, you meant 10-year-old wine." Priest: "I said what I said."

Hot Dog

Two homeless alcoholics want to get drunk but don't have enough money for even the cheapest drinks in any bar. So one of them devises a clever plan: he tells his friend, "We should buy a hot-dog sausage with the last of our money and stick it down my pants, then drink a load of drinks. But then when the bill comes, you get down and suck on the hot-dog, and it'll look like you're sucking on my dick. So then we'll get thrown out without paying, and we can just go to another bar and do the same thing again."

His friend agrees, so they buy the hot-dog, stick it down the first dude's pants, go to the bar, and then the second dude begins to suck on the hot-dog as agreed. They are thrown out and hit another four bars this way. In the end, as they lie drunk on the floor in some alleyway, the second guy says, "Well, what a great night. Free beers in five different bars!" The first guy says, "Yeah! Especially since the hot-dog fell out before we even reached the first bar!"

Memes

Ballerina

Why do ballerinas wear tutus?

The one-ones are too small and the three-threes are too big.

Suicide

A hot girl wants to commit suicide and jump from a bridge when an ugly, smelly, homeless weirdo walks up to her. And he says, "Hey you hot babe, let's fuck." She just answers, "Get the fuck away you ugly bastard." The guy just laughs and says, "Alright, I'll wait down there."

Orphan

Why do orphans eat cereal with water?

Because dad never came back with the milk.

Mind

Why do women have cleaner minds than men? Because they change theirs more often.

Aid

What do you call a 3-sum with a girl with AIDS?

Nut in the butt.

Apple

An apple a day can do so much more than keep the doctor away... it can keep ANYONE away.

if you throw it hard enough.

Emo

What do you call emos that live in the Bahamas?

Tropical depressions.