DoS jokes
What do a coin and an Irish man have in common?
They're both fun to flip off.
What do you call 2 Indians on a dating website? Connect the dots.
What do you call a plane with no wings? Sally.
Why do ballerinas wear tutus?
The one-ones are too small and the three-threes are too big.
A hot girl wants to commit suicide and jump from a bridge when an ugly, smelly, homeless weirdo walks up to her. And he says, "Hey you hot babe, let's fuck." She just answers, "Get the fuck away you ugly bastard." The guy just laughs and says, "Alright, I'll wait down there."
Memes
What is Beethoven doing now?
Decomposing.
Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
Because dad never came back with the milk.
Why do women have cleaner minds than men? Because they change theirs more often.
What do you call a 3-sum with a girl with AIDS?
Nut in the butt.
What do kids and drugs have in common? I sell both of them.
An apple a day can do so much more than keep the doctor away... it can keep ANYONE away.
if you throw it hard enough.
What do you call a boomerang that never comes back?
Daddy.
Man to woman: "Would you sleep with me for one million dollars?"
Woman: "Sure."
Man: "How about for ten dollars?"
Woman: "What do you think I am?"
Man: "We’ve already established what you are. All we’re doing is negotiating price."
What do you call a fat, ugly, and hairy woman with a rape whistle? A feminist.
What do you call a person with Down syndrome in a bathtub?
Vegetable soup.
What do you call emos that live in the Bahamas?
Tropical depressions.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special Forces.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn't matter, he won't come anyway.
What instrument do a pair of sheep play? The two-baaaa.
What do you call dynamite on steroids? - High Explosive.