What do you call a dog turd in China?
Waste of food.
What do you call it when two transgender midgets have sex?
And microtransaction.
What do you do when a woman is choking?
Back up a couple inches.
How do you get a black girl to suck your meat?
Put barbecue sauce on it.
Someone asked the former 2016 presidential candidate Hillary Clinton why she lost the 2016 presidential election to Donald John Trump, and the former 2016 presidential candidate Hillary Clinton said, "Because someone asked her what she would do for a Klondike Bar?"
What do you call a guy that's high in a wheelchair?
A baked potato.
I told my mom, "Do you want to see a magic trick?" She said yes. I said, "You are going to have a hot dog and cream pie together." My mom said, "No, I'm not," but I told my mom, "I'm going to need your assistance." First, I need you to lick and suck on my hot dog that is attached to me, which she did. The next minute my mom has a cream pie over her face. Then I told my mom, "You see, you are going to have a hot dog and cream pie together." Then my mom said, "When you are right, you are right."
My two friends came to me one day and said they had the best blowjob that they ever had from my little sister. So I ask my sister, "Is it true that you gave my friends blowjobs?" She said yes.
My sister asked me, "Do you want one?" I said yeah. My sister gave me a blowjob and wow, just like my friends, it was the best blowjob that I ever had. As an older brother, I couldn't be more prouder.
Why do orphans like playing tennis so much?
Because it’s the only way they’ll ever get love.
How do you make a snooker table laugh? Tickle its balls!
What do you call a banana that can dance?
CHUPAPIMUNYANYO BUISNESS [sic]
What do you call fake spaghetti?
An impasta.
What do you call a midget stripper?
A pocket pussy.
Do you have a shovel? Because I'm digging that ass.
Do you like soccer? My favorite player is Ronaldo, but we can still get Messi.
What do two priests say to each other when they walk into an orphanage?
"Let us pray."
What do you call it when a bunch of guys who look the same have an orgy?
A doppelgangbang.
Do you think when the Secret Service heard the gunshot they were like, "Donald Duck"?
What do you call a Lesbian at a Barbecue? A LGBBQ.
What do you call it when a gorilla bumps uglies with an orangutan?
Monkeypox.
