DOE jokes
Why does Mao Zedong like the east coast?
Because there is a red Sun in the sky.
When a deaf girl master baits, does she use the other hand to moan?
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
What does a pregnant lady and pigs have in common?
They're both fat.
Wife: "How would you describe me?"
Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."
Wife: "What does that mean?"
Husband: "Adorable (A), beautiful (B), cute (C), delightful (D), elegant (E), fashionable (F), gorgeous (G), and hot (H)."
Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"
Husband: "I'm just kidding!"
Why does this always happen to me...
How many kids does it take to change a lightbulb?
Apparently not 27. Because my basement's still dark...
Why does a straight guy act gay? Because he wants to feel wanted and wants to be BFFs with the hottest girls.
Why does the emo hate Christmas?
The ornaments get hanged, and they don't.
What's the difference between a dead person and a walkie-talkie?
A dead person does not walkie or talkie.
If chickens make chicken nuggies, does that mean dinosaur chickens make Dino nuggies?!?
CONSPIRACY!!!
Why does America suck at chess? Because they already lost their two towers.
What does Michael Joseph Jackson say to adults when he sees them?
Keep away from me-hee-hee.
How does the moon cut his hair?
Eclipse it!
Q: What does LMAO mean?
A: Launching Missiles At Orphanages.
Why does the orphan do robberies?
Because he wants to be wanted.
Where does the killer whale go to get its teeth done?
The orca Don-tist.
Why does an emo wish they were a fish?
Because they're underwater.
What part of a computer system does an orphan not have?
A motherboard.
What song does Saturn sing?
"If you like it then you should have put a ring on it."
Why does Michael Jackson like Doge Miner? He thinks it's about minors dressed in doge costumes.