DOE jokes
What does a paleontologist and woke people have in common?
They both enjoy digging up the past.
What does a cannibal call a wheelchair user?
Fast food.
How many Kardashians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One really small one and one really small black guy.
What does a bridge and a fat chick have in common?
They’ll eventually get laid by a Mexican.
Why does JD Vance have strained diplomatic relations with Turkey?
He took away their ottoman!
What does a pregnant slave and a payless sale have in common?
Buy one, get one free.
Why does OSHA require women to wear panties?
Because every manhole needs a cover.
What does the word circumcise mean?
Cut off a boy's or a man's dick, or cut off a girl's or a woman's foreskin.
What does a white person say when they're surrounded by black guys? "Hey, who turned the lights out?!"
What's the difference between Rorochan and skydivers?
One does it for the cash, the other for the views.
Where does a black Eskimo live?
In a Nigglu.
Why does JD Vance not need a conviction?
His running mate has 34 of them!
If a pregnant lady murders someone, does the child get an assist?
What do nail polish and panties have in common?
Both come off with alcohol.
My boyfriend always likes when I wear my fishnet sleeves. He says it looks great on me, but he doesn’t know that my skin is covered with scars... no one does. No one questions why I wear them everyday. I hope it stays like that because I can’t deal with my mom finding out that I still hurt myself.
What does the long distance call and a Black person have in common?
They both don’t work.
A Thai woman ran into a wall. What does she break?
Her boner.
President Joseph Biden said during the first presidential debate of the 2024 presidential election that he does not debate as well as he used to. Mr. Biden also can't think as well as he used to either, but then again when Mr. Biden was a United States senator in the state of Delaware he never could think because thinking was never one of his strengths and that is the reason why Mr. Biden became President Obama's vice president in the first place.
Oh well, that's politics.
Adam and Eve are wondering whether they are black or white. Eve says, "Why don't you go and ask God?"
So Adam goes into the Garden of Eden and shouts out to God, "Are we black or white?" A big booming voice bellows out, "You are what you are."
He immediately goes back to Eve and tells her that they are white. "How do you know?" asks Eve. "Because he said, 'You are what you are,'" Adam replied. "Why does that mean we are white?" asked Eve. "Because if we were black, He would have said, 'You is what you is.'"
Why does Miss Piggy douche with honey?
Because Kermit likes his pork sweet and sour.