DOE jokes
Why does Barry Bannan laugh when he plays football?
Because the grass tickles his balls because he's so short.
How long does it take a baby to cook in the microwave?
I don't know. I close my eyes when I masturbate.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends, how hard can you throw them?
What does a blowjob from an 80-year-old and bungee jumps have in common?
You feel the rush, but don't look down.
What does dark humor and a child with cancer have in common? They never get old.
What does a dead baby look like?
I don't know, I close my eyes when I masturbate.
How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two; one to screw in the lightbulb and one to SUCK MY COCK!
I don't know if this is a joke or a question, but:
If killing yourself sends you to hell, where does sitting in the waiting room get you?
What does a kid with cancer and a house fly have in common?
A life expectancy of 15-25 days.
What type of file does it take to turn a 4 mm hole to a 44 mm hole?
A pedophile.
What does it say on Stephen Hawking's grave?
"Rust in peace."
I asked my zombie boyfriend, "Does he have a brain?" Because he's stupid asf.
What does America say?
A-marry-ca!
Where does Stephen Hawking go when he breaks his arm? PC World.
Which brand of underwear does Thor wear?
Asgard.
How does the Eskimo make a house of cards?
Igloos it.
What is the difference between a school bully and a feminist?
The school bully does not hide behind their computer screen.
What does Michael Jackson and a Playstation have in common?
They're both made of plastic and children turn them on.
What does Germany and the rest of the world have in common? They both use gases to poison one thing or another.
Why does the Sun go to school?
To get brighter!