Disease jokes
The only profession where one could have coronavirus and still go to work is a suicide terrorist.
If an athlete gets athlete's foot... What does an astronaut get? Mistletoe!
I forgot the joke.
Are you corona? Cuz it’s hard to breathe around you ;)
What's bald and can't grow no hair?
A kid with cancer.
Snow White and the six Dwarfs, Sneezy was caught by covid-19 quarantine!
Have you ever walked in to Stephen Hawking's house?
No, neither has he.
A kid with hallucinations and cancer is on a Jeopardy game show.
"What's behind curtain #1... YOU HAVE WON..... CANCER!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"Cancer isn't real. It's probably special effects."
Every time I go to the store I look in the deodorant section and my dyslexia acts up. Instead of "antiperspirant," I read "antidepressant." At least I get a bunch of extra snacks out of my shopping mistakes.
Q: What did the deaf, dumb, and blind kid get for Christmas?
A: Leukemia.
Kid: I have the corona virus!
Nurse: Here is an ice pack.
How is a child with cancer and dark humor similar? They never get old.
Someone walked into a cancer ward and asked for a skin fade.
A lady sees a doctor about a tummy ache. After her check up, the Doctor said, “Looks like you’ll be needing nappies in about 9 months time.”
The lady asks, “Am I pregnant?” To which the Doctor replied, “No, you’ve got bowel cancer.”
Question: What’s bald and is in a straight line?
Answer: The cancer ward. 😵😂😂
How did the tree get sick?
It got tinsel-itis.
I had a glass of Schweppes lemonade in one hand and a glass of R. Whites in the other. I got into a hot sweat. I think I have Corona Virus.
A woman walks into a doctor's office. She schedules an appointment and sits down in the waiting room. When it's her turn to talk to the doctor, she describes all of her symptoms, and they're unlike anything he's heard before. The doctor runs a few tests and steps out of the room. He comes back later, and says, "Well, I have good news and bad news." The woman says, "I'll hear the good news first please." The doctor replies, "The good news is we're naming a disease after you!"
What’s pink, black and has 17 nipples?
A trash can behind the cancer ward.