Knock, knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimer's has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.
What it's a lot Syphilis
Your momma's so fat that she should probably be worried about the increased risk of cardiovascular disease.
What did sally get for Christmas cancer
Old man goes to the doctor.
The doctor says, "The test results are back, and I'm sad to say you have cancer and Alzheimer's."
The old man says, "Phew! At least it's not cancer!"
How do you get bubblegum out of your hair?
Cancer.
What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas?
Cancer.
"I'm sorry," the doctor says, "you have rare and very contagious disease. We must quarantine you and you'll only be fed cheese and bologna."
"Will that cure me?" the patient asks.
"Well, no," the doctor replies, "but it's the only food that will fit under the door."
Why did they call off the leper hockey game?
There was a face-off in the corner.
