Disabled jokes
How are this joke and the kid with cancer alike?
It never gets old.
Stephen Hawking had a high I.Q., but still had to learn how to be disabled.
What is a group of disabled people in a coma called?
A salad.
What can a gay man with a physical disability do better than a heterosexual woman that doesn't have a physical disability?
Suck a big cock.
Guy, it was so weird yesterday. I saw a guy, and he kept repeating the same thing over and over. I hate people with dementia. I told my mom to get a new mirror, but she won’t listen to me. It’s almost like I said it like 20 times every time I say it.
There is this boy in my year; he is in a wheelchair, so I kicked a football at him and pushed him, and then I shouted, "Rocket League!"
What do sped gymnasts wear?
A Reotard.
What do you call a walkie-talkie for retards? -- A stumblie-mumblie.
This disabled kid walked up to me, so I asked what disease he had. He said, "Lima." So I said, "Come again?" And he said, "Lima nuts." And I asked if that was a fruit, and he said, "No, I'm a vegetable."
What's the opposite of Christopher Walken?
Christopher Reeve.
"Immobile" means "I'm mobile" in my books.
A girl walks in the room. She asks her mom, "Why's my name Flower?" Her mom said, "When you were born, a flower fell on your head." Brick walks in the room. Jasvidnqzkdvsosbd.
I saw a disabled person in the super market. They were at the vegetable aisle.
I am having a shit and there[sic] nothing else to read.
Why did Susie fall off the swing?
Because she had no arms.
Knock knock. Who's there?
Not Susie.
If laughter is the best medicine, shouldn't we go up to disabled people and laugh at them?
Why can't people understand these jokes?
A boy with Down Syndrome was talking with his mom.
“Mom, why did God make me like this?” he said.
“It’s because God made you special,” she said.
“Just kidding, I was only talking about your needs.”
Why couldn't the chicken cross the road?
Because it was disabled.
My disabled friend rolled into a burning orphanage and saved lots of kids. When he came out, the kids tried to play with him because his wheels were on fire. They called him Hot Wheels.