What do you call getting gonorrhea from a disabled person?
A slow clap.
Why did Stephanie fall off the swing?
Because she has no arms.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Not Stephanie!
I bullied a handicap today.
What is he gonna do? Stand up for himself?
You know why I only date disabled people? Cause they can't get away.
What can’t a person with no arms do: if you're happy and you know it, clap your hands.
What do you call a disabled person who deals drugs?
A wheel dealer.
There's a disabled kid in my class, right? Oops, should've brought my Hot Wheels tracks.
What do you call a cripple convention? A salad.
"Fuckin blakfellas be drunk all the time," slurred Barry McKenzie over his tenth pint of guiness.
If you got a priest, a Rhodes scholar, and a politician in a room, what would you get?
The Royal Commission.
Alternatively, Tony Abbott.
Did you ever see any white men drowning in the Atlantic Ocean?
Yeah, it went on and on.
What do you call a blind and illiterate military leader?
Winston Churchill.
What does a disabled disco play?
"When your legs don’t work like they used to before."
What did John Cena say to the blind kid? "You can't see me."
What do you call a guy at your doorstep with no arms or legs? Matt.
Balls.
What do you call a room full of disabled people with epilepsy?
A seizure salad.
Why did Steven Hawking go to hell?
Because there is a stairway to heaven.
What do you say to a crippled man getting bullied?
"Why not you stand up for yourself?"
My stepdad has stage 4 cancer and is going through chemotherapy... at least he saves money on shampoo and conditioner.
