Disability jokes
What do you call a disabled person drowning?
A boat.
What do you call a downie superhero?
Chromo-doner.
Which one gets bullied the most, autism, Down syndrome, or ADHD?
What is Stephen Hawking's favourite music?
Rock and roll.
If you think Tracy Latimer's murder was in any way justified, put on your helmet 'cause you're about to miss the short bus.
Michelle Obama wanted more vegetables in school.
What's the difference between parking a car and finding a girlfriend?
All the good ones are taken, so you stick it in the disabled one and hope nobody finds out.
Yo mama so dumb, when I told her my friend was mute she said, “Can't you unmute her?”
A woman asked Stephen Hawking to dance, and he replied, "I'm not much good, I have two left feet."
"Then how about Karaoke?"
To which he replied, "I have two left throats."
Stephen Hawking died because he lost Wi-Fi connection.
What do you call a paraplegic stuck in a tower?
In trouble!
How did the blind boy's parents punish him?
Rearrange the furniture.
I gave a deaf kid AirPods.
Why was Stephen Hawking known as lazy?
Because he was always sitting on the job.
What has 4 wheels, no wings, and flies?
A dead cripple.
How does Stephen Hawking have sex?
Enter, backspace. Enter, backspace.
What did Stephen Hawking say—I mean, type—when he saw a beautiful woman?
"That's the best shag I never had."
Why didn't Stephen Hawking ever eat chicken wings? Because he didn't exist.
A person with a wheelchair makes a joke. No one laughs.
Inner thought: "Wheely Manerva, wheely."
How do you surprise a blind guy?
Say, "Surprise!"
You're as useless as Stevie Wonder's eyes!