Disability jokes
I got sent to the principal's office for telling the kid in the wheelchair to stand up for himself.
How does a disabled person play chess?
I think you forgot they don't have legs.
I got my son a bike for his birthday. The ungrateful fucker just sat in his wheelchair all day crying.
Have you ever seen a blind man swim?
No.
Neither has he.
Why did the blind man get killed? Because he never saw it coming.
Why are so many people making fun of people with wheelchairs?
Because they can’t stand up for themselves.
Why can’t the blind man see?
He just can’t see. 🫤
A woman asked Stephen Hawking to dance, and he replied, "I'm not much good, I have two left feet."
"Then how about Karaoke?"
To which he replied, "I have two left throats."
I asked this kid for a high five, but he could not reach my hand.
I saw a kid in a wheelchair, and he was getting bullied. I said, "Stand up for yourself!"
What do you call a disabled person that can walk?
Enabled.
Why can’t Helen Keller drive? She’s dead.
If you think Tracy Latimer's murder was in any way justified, put on your helmet 'cause you're about to miss the short bus.
Why can’t Sally hang herself?
She does not have arms.
What do you call a bunch of biracial, retarded kids? The Special Olympics.
Why is Helen Keller's snatch always sore?
She wipes with a Brillo pad.
What do you call a Down syndrome kid who has been physically abused by older teenagers and her parents for a total of 16 years and has red marks all over their body?
Not funny because Down syndrome jokes aren't funny ;)
How does Stephen Hawking charge his computer?
How does Stephen Hawking have sex? Keyboard sex!
I'm deaf. My deaf ex-wife cheated on me with a guy who I met on a deaf social trip who was also deaf. I guess I didn't see the signs at the time.
What's black and at the top of a staircase?
Not Stephen Hawking.