Disability jokes
I got my son a bike for his birthday. The ungrateful fucker just sat in his wheelchair all day crying.
Why did the blind man get killed? Because he never saw it coming.
What's black and at the top of the staircase? Stephen Hawking after a house fire.
Why can't Stephen Hawking go metal detecting?
Because when it beeps, it's him!
I was in my car listening to my radio. Steve Winwood's song came on, "Just Roll With It, Baby." I said that must be one of Stephen Hawking's favorite songs; he sings it to his girlfriend.
Why are so many people making fun of people with wheelchairs?
Because they can’t stand up for themselves.
How does a disabled person play chess?
I think you forgot they don't have legs.
There’s this girl who gets bullied for being in a wheelchair.
Why don’t she stand up for herself?
What do you call a disabled person that can walk?
Enabled.
I saw a kid in a wheelchair, and he was getting bullied. I said, "Stand up for yourself!"
A woman asked Stephen Hawking to dance, and he replied, "I'm not much good, I have two left feet."
"Then how about Karaoke?"
To which he replied, "I have two left throats."
Why can’t the blind man see?
He just can’t see. 🫤
I asked this kid for a high five, but he could not reach my hand.
Why can’t Helen Keller drive? She’s dead.
Does anyone know where I can get that picture that went around the internet of Steven Hawking looking at the stairway to Heaven and saying “Oh Fu-k”?
What’s Stephen Hawkins favourite shampoo and conditioner?
Head and shoulders.
What do you call Stephen Hawking going fast?
Hot Wheels.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite drink?
His dribble.
How did Steven Hawking die?
He lost internet connection.
He lost Wifi connection...