Disability jokes
What do you call a three-legged cow?
Disabled.
Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.
Your mom is so weak, when she jumped from the Twin Towers, her baby became disabled.
How did Helen Keller's parents punish her?
They told her to go find the light.
What is the definition of Endless Love?
Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder playing tennis!
What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?
The wheelchair. 😎
I was in a public bathroom in a handicap stall, and when I got out, a handicapped man told me that I was an a**hole. I told him, "Bet you won't stand up and say that to my face," and then he broke down.
Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.
How do you surprise a blind man? Put a plunger in the toilet.
There’s this girl who gets bullied for being in a wheelchair.
Why don’t she stand up for herself?
The two biggest dyslexic guy lies: "My check is in your mouth," and "I won't come in your mailbox."
How many apps did he download?
Well, he did run out of storage.
You know how Stephen is smart, which class did he skip?
Leg day.
I once fought with a man in a wheelchair.
He couldn't stand a chance.
Helen Keller fell down a well. She screamed and screamed until she was blue in the hands.
What is Helen Keller's favorite color?
Velcro.
Why did the disabled chicken cross the road?
To get its wheelchair!
Why did Stephen Hawking cross the road?
Oh wait, he didn't.
There is a young man smoking and a woman in a wheelchair. The woman says, "Why is a young man like you smoking?" The man turns around and says, "Why the fuck are you wearing trainers?"
Just a joke: When Stephen Hawking fell over and hurt his leg, his dad said, "It'll get better, just walk it off!"