Disability jokes
What do you call a graveyard full of disabled people?
A cabbage patch.
What do you say when a handicapped man forgets something? "He knew it like the back of his hand."
When a deaf person has sex, do they use one hand to moan?
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Knock knock.
WHO'S THERE?
*Starts putting up hand signs.*
Helen Keller def faked it.
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite football anthem?
You'll Never Walk Alone.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite line in Rambo?
"Don't push me."
What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and his wheelchair?
At least his wheelchair can pull a woman.
What did Stephen Hawking say when he rode a bike?
"Hey look...no hands...or legs!"
What Stephen Hawking doesn't know about wheelchairs isn't worth knowing.
Rory Burrows is dyslexic.
What happens to Stephen Hawking when he logs in to his account on Google when it says, "I am not a robot?"
What was Helen Keller's favorite game when she was a kid?
I spy.
My girlfriend broke up with me, so I decided to take her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?
Have you met Bofa?
Bofa deez blind kids!
Stephen Hawking talks by clicks. Two clicks is "hi," and five is "dab me up."
My speech impediment has gotten so worse that I stutter when typing sentences.
What motorway lane does Stephen Hawking use?
Hard shoulder.
I told Hellen Keller it was a hair dryer, little did she know it was a Glock.
What happened to Stephen Hawking after he reached Heaven?
Nothing yet. He is still struggling to get up the stairway to Heaven.