Disability jokes
Why do blind kids like plane crashes?
Because you can’t dislike what you have never seen.
What do you call a disabled person in a fire?
"HOT WHEELS!"
What does Stephen Hawking put his food in? A microwave.
How do you kidnap Stephen Hawking?
Shut off his computer.
What do you call a graveyard full of disabled people?
A cabbage patch.
Stephen Hawking can pass any test, but there's one test he can't pass. It is the PACER test.
Stephen Hawking talks by clicks. Two clicks is "hi," and five is "dab me up."
My speech impediment has gotten so worse that I stutter when typing sentences.
I told Hellen Keller it was a hair dryer, little did she know it was a Glock.
What motorway lane does Stephen Hawking use?
Hard shoulder.
Stephen Hawking was incredible at poker, he had no tell whatsoever.
Stephen Hawking died because he got unplugged from his Ethernet cord.
Did you know why they added Alexa for Stephen Hawking?
Someone booted Stephen Hawking offline. Maybe next time he will stand for the pledge/anthem.
Why did Stephen Hawking go to hell?
'cus there was only a stairway to heaven!
How does Stephen Hawking get clean?
He uses Tesco car wash.
What do you get when you light Stephen Hawking on fire? A fried PC.
What happened to Stephen Hawking after he reached Heaven?
Nothing yet. He is still struggling to get up the stairway to Heaven.
Comedy is so woke these days. You can't make fun of any disadvantaged group.
Except people with Alzheimer's. They'll just forget you made the joke in five minutes anyway.
What do you call a retarded Mexican?
Ricardo.