Disability jokes

Guy

Mom: See that guy over there with no hands, tell him to clap.

Son: Mom, I'm blind.

Mom: Exactly!

Man

A blind man walked into me at a store. I said, "Watch it, bitch!" and he said, "Sorry, I didn't see you there."

Seal

What's the difference between a seal and a special kid?

They both go: "Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh!"

Dog

Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away?

I'm sure you would run away if your name was kjdhfkuaysbgfbkuejgf.

Cripple

Someone tracked down a cripple and said, "You can hide, but you can't run!"

People

Why did people bully Steven Hawking?

Because he couldn't stand up for himself.

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  • Tour

    I heard he's doing a revival tour next month. It's called "Stephen Hawking Unplugged."

    Eye

    Why are you so tired if you can’t see? Because you are blind.