Disability jokes
Why do blind kids like plane crashes?
Because you can’t dislike what you have never seen.
What do you call a disabled person in a fire?
"HOT WHEELS!"
When a deaf person has sex, do they use one hand to moan?
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite line in Rambo?
"Don't push me."
What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and his wheelchair?
At least his wheelchair can pull a woman.
A woman asked Stephen Hawking to dance, and he replied, "I'm not much good, I have two left feet."
"Then how about Karaoke?"
To which he replied, "I have two left throats."
What was Helen Keller's favorite game when she was a kid?
I spy.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Knock knock.
WHO'S THERE?
*Starts putting up hand signs.*
Knock knock. Who's there? Beep boop S.t.e.p.h.e.n beep boop H.a.w.k.i.n.g.
What did Stephen Hawking say when he rode a bike?
"Hey look...no hands...or legs!"
What Stephen Hawking doesn't know about wheelchairs isn't worth knowing.
Rory Burrows is dyslexic.
What happens to Stephen Hawking when he logs in to his account on Google when it says, "I am not a robot?"
Have you met Bofa?
Bofa deez blind kids!
Helen Keller def faked it.
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite football anthem?
You'll Never Walk Alone.
Why did Stephen Hawking die? He couldn't log in.
What do you call a graveyard full of disabled people?
A cabbage patch.
Stephen Hawking can pass any test, but there's one test he can't pass. It is the PACER test.
Why did the blind man cross the road?
Don't ask me, he can't even see where he's going.