Disability jokes

I told this man to rev his vehicle.

Didn't know wheelchairs can't rev.

Can disabled enable dark mode?

Did you know Helen Keller had a dollhouse in her backyard?

No, and neither did she.

What do you get if a disabled person falls off a building? Mashed potatoes.

There was a disabled kid at my door. He said, "I'm selling some cookies, want to buy one?" I said, "Well, if you stand up, sure."

What do blind people and an orphan have in common? Both can't see their parents.

Stephen Hawking went on a date last night.

She left after 15 minutes, complaining she didn't like his tone.

Someone threatened to break into my house, but I am in a wheelchair. I said sure, and I moved everything upstairs and sat on the stairs so he couldn’t steal anything.

A girl walks up to her blind friend who she had not seen in a while and says: "Long time no see!"

My girlfriend dumped me, so I stole her wheelchair and guess who came crawling back!

A hand job from a deaf person counts as oral.

I'm doing something Stephen Hawking can't do... pressing "I'm not a robot."

I can't stand up when I laugh hard; neither can they.

Why does Helen Keller use her left hand to play with herself?

So she can moan with her right hand.

What do you call a person that can't operate a wheelchair?

Stephen Hawking.

I'm in a wheelchair, right, so I've tried everything but one stand up.

It didn't work.

Stephen Hawking's last words were the Windows closing sound.

I beat up a blind kid, but he says he's the strongest. He never saw that one!

So I got my brother a jumping castle for his birthday. That bitch cried in his wheelchair.

That autistic kid having sex for the first time:

"U The Hips, U The Hips!"