Disability jokes
Why did the one-armed man cross the road?
To get to the second-hand shop.
Stop making autism jokes, calling us "retards." It is not cool.
Why is Stephen Hawking a bad influence on children?
Because he only looks one way when crossing the road.
A dyslexic walks into a bra.
What was Helen Keller's favorite color?
Velcro.
You know what’s impossible?
Steven Walking.
I bought my spoiled brother a trampoline for his birthday, but he decided to sit in his wheelchair like a little bitch.
Why couldn't Sally write with the pen? (Friend: Idk, why?) Because she had no arms.
Why couldn't Sally play Tennis? (Friend: Because she had no arms?) Yes, she had no arms.
Why did Sally fall off the swing? (Friend: Because she had no arms?) No, Joe pushed her.
Why couldn't Sally pick up the box? (Friend: *Some weird guess*) Because she had no arms.
Why did Sally drop her ice cream? (Friend: Because she had no arms?) Because she got hit by a bus.
Knock Knock. (Friend: Who's there?) Not Sally.
A handicapped person was making fun of me, so I walked away.
The real reason Stephen Hawking died is because he tried to overclock his wheelchair.
So, a blind man got run over by a car... a parked car.
What did the blind kid get for Christmas? He hasn’t seen it yet...
What did the kids with no arms get? He doesn’t know, he’s still trying to figure out how to open it. :))))
I played piano at a Worthmore disabled elderly center. Then after I was done, I said, "How about you give me a standing ovation?"
I regret it to this day. Now I am forced to live here at Worthmore, and sit on my wheelchair, sad and lonely.
What does a deaf person do when they hear people scream? I don't know; it's not like they're gonna hear it anyway.
What do you call a blind German? A Nazi (Not-see)!
Stephen Hawking is such a bad role model for our kids.
He only ever looks one way when crossing the street.
People say I should be proud of my autism, but truth be told, I'm only in it for the help in class.
I just wanted to say...
These disabled jokes are quite offensive. I'm not disabled in any way, but people reading might be affected in many ways. Yes, some of them are amusing, but there's a difference between having a joke and being plain rude.
Please take my feedback into account. Thanks!
There was a blind man. He was blind. Ha, sucks for him.
To the man in the wheelchair who stole my camouflage jacket, "You can hide but you can't run."