Dinosaur jokes
Do you know why dinosaurs can't eat hyenas?
Because they're dead! The last thing they ate was some rock.
Why was the baby Dinosaur an orphan?
His family was blown up by meteors.
Your hairline is so far back it was friends with the dinosaurs!
your hair line goes so far the dinosaurs will see it
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Lick-a-lotta-puss.
(Note: this joke is not one of the worst jokes ever because it is obscene or offensive; it’s just a bad joke.) Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because they’re dead.
Why did the Dinosaur cross the road?
'Cause the Chicken wasn't born yet.
What do you call a Dino stripper?
A dinowhore.
Your mum is so fat, when she slept on the bed, the bed cracked and they had to replace it by a dinosaur.
These are all of my terrible jokes.
Two antennas met on a roof, they fell in love and got married. The ceremony was alright, but the reception was amazing.
A jumper cable walks into a bar and the bartender said, "I'll serve you but don't start anything."
A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
Two cannibals are eating a clown, one says, "Does this taste funny to you? I'm joking of course!"
Dejamoo: the feeling that you've heard this bull before.
A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident and said to the doctor "I can't feel my legs." The doctor said, "I know, I amputated your arms!"
I went to seafood disco last week, I pulled a muscle.
What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.
Two fish swim into a concrete wall, one says, "Dam!"
A mystic dwarf escapes from a jail, the call went out for a "small medium at large."
A man walks into a bar with solid tar under his arm, he says, "A beer please, and one for the road."
Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? The p is silent.
Yo mama so fat that she should be worried, diabetes is a serious problem.
What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut, duh.
A priest, a rabbi, and a cleric walk into a bar. The cleric, due to his religious constructions, does not drink alcohol. The others do the same, they have a pleasant fun and nothing bad happens.
What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.
I remember the last words my grandad said before he kicked the bucket, "How far do you think I can kick this bucket?"
A man walks into a bar, his alcohol independence is pulling this family apart.
I like my coffee like my women, on sometimes with a penis.
A man is working at a bar, a money comes in and orders a banana martini. The man wakes up and tells his story to his wife, he is ignored and he turns around sobbing. His marriage is falling apart.
Why didn't Jesus play hockey? Soccer and baseball are more popular in Mexico.
What's green and has wheels? Grass, the wheels were a lie.
What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have wheels except the duck.
Why couldn't the dinosaur break the wall? I don't know. I'm asking you.
Why did the old woman put rainbow roller skates on her walker? She has dementia.
There are an owl and a squirrel watching a farmer go by, they owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing. It's an owl it can't talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because the owl is a bird of prey.
Why can't dinosaurs clap?
Because they're dead.
What do you get when you cross a pig with a dinosaur?
Jurassic Park.
Why can't the T-Rex cross the road?
Because he's extinct.
If chickens make chicken nuggies, does that mean dinosaur chickens make Dino nuggies?!?
CONSPIRACY!!!
Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? The "p" is silent.
Why can’t dinosaurs clap?
Because they're dead.
What did the dinosaur say to the man?
It didn’t, they're dead.
What is, tyyyyyy a tree is it is the difference between a?
Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl urinate? Because walls.
Which dinosaurs masturbated the most? Triceratops, they were the horniest!