Difference jokes
What's the difference between the Titanic and Georgie from "It"?
Georgie floated!
What’s the difference between an onion and a photo of a dead relative? Nothing, they both make you cry when you look at it.
Roses are red, your penis is blue, the bed sheet has turned a different color, too.
What’s the difference between a bank vault and you aunt's anus?
The owner of bank vaults don’t force you to penetrate it.
What do an Apple company and an orphanage have that are different?
Apples actually get picked... Unlike little Timmy here... He's been here for 16 years.
What's the difference between a golfer and a skydiver?
A golfer goes *whack* "darn" and a skydiver goes "darn" *whack.*
What's the difference between a black person and an apple?
An apple chooses to hang.
What's the difference between dad jokes and bad jokes?
The letter b.
What is the difference between a kid with cancer and dark humor?
Dark humor never dies!
What's the difference between an abortion clinic and a computer? Ctrl+Alt+Delete.
What’s the difference between prison and concentration camps?
At least you don’t die when you shower.
What's the difference between a hipster and a hockey player? A hockey player changes his pads every third period.
What is the difference between runners and my car?
My car is still running.
What is the difference between a dog pound and an orphanage?
In a dog pound, people actually want them.
What's the difference between a dead person and a walkie-talkie?
A dead person does not walkie or talkie.
What’s the difference between weed and pussy?
If you can smell weed from across the room, it means the weed's good.
What is the difference between Usain Bolt and Hitler?
Usain Bolt can finish a race.
What’s the difference between cereal and a baby?
I personally think cereal is not nutritious.
What's the difference between Pikachu and an orphan?
At least someone chose Pikachu.
What’s the difference between a woman and a policeman? One of them have rights.