Difference

Difference Jokes

Dad

What's the difference between you and my dad? You come home.

Asshole

What’s the difference between 69 and a family reunion?

You only see one asshole in 69.

Pizza

What's the difference between a pizza and a guy you really hate?

One won't scream when you remove their meat.

Paul Walker

What is the difference between me and Paul Walker?

I’ve watched Fast and Furious Seven.

Dad

What is the difference between your dad and a video game?

Your dad doesn’t beat you.

Fly

What’s the difference between a fly and Lady Diana?

The sound when they hit the windshield.

Man

What is the difference between a black man and Jew?

One was born burnt.

Lead

Difference between Texas and Flint, Michigan?

Nothing, no one cares how much lead is in those kids.

Jew

What's the difference between a black Jew and a white Jew?

The black Jew sits in the back of the oven.

Patient

What’s the difference between a cancer patient and a British news reporter in the South?

They usually don’t live to tell the tale.

Cancer

What is the difference between Nicole Brown Simpson and cancer?

OJ couldn’t kill cancer.

Lead

What’s the difference between Texas and Flint, Michigan?

Nothing; no one cares how much lead is in the kids.

School

What is the difference between an Isis training camp and a school?

Not sure, I just fly the drone.

Alcohol

What's the difference between John Wayne and Jack Daniels?

Jack Daniels is still killing Indians.

School

What's the difference between a school in Pakistan and an Al Qaeda base?

Not too sure. I just fly the drone.

Man

What's the difference between a crumbled man and 9/11... nothing, they're both crumbled.

Mum

Your mum is so fat, she needs 3 different watches for 3 different time zones.

Emo

Q. What's the difference between pizza and an emo?

A. The pizza doesn't cut itself.