Difference jokes

What’s the difference between a dog and a marine biologist?

One wags its tail, and the other tags a whale!

What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you?

Pull the pin and throw it back.

What's the difference between you and my dad? You come home.

Uremn es abarancin yngnumma gety asuma qshi tun?

What’s the difference between 69 and a family reunion?

You only see one asshole in 69.

What's the difference between a pizza and a guy you really hate?

One won't scream when you remove their meat.

What is the difference between me and Paul Walker?

I’ve watched Fast and Furious Seven.

What is the difference between your dad and a video game?

Your dad doesn’t beat you.

What’s the difference between a fly and Lady Diana?

The sound when they hit the windshield.

What is the difference between a black man and Jew?

One was born burnt.

Difference between Texas and Flint, Michigan?

Nothing, no one cares how much lead is in those kids.

What's the difference between a black Jew and a white Jew?

The black Jew sits in the back of the oven.

What’s the difference between video games and my dad?

My dad doesn’t beat me.

What’s the difference between a cancer patient and a British news reporter in the South?

They usually don’t live to tell the tale.

What is the difference between Nicole Brown Simpson and cancer?

OJ couldn’t kill cancer.

What’s the difference between Texas and Flint, Michigan?

Nothing; no one cares how much lead is in the kids.

What is the difference between an Isis training camp and a school?

Not sure, I just fly the drone.

What's the difference between John Wayne and Jack Daniels?

Jack Daniels is still killing Indians.

What's the difference between a school in Pakistan and an Al Qaeda base?

Not too sure. I just fly the drone.

What's the difference between a crumbled man and 9/11... nothing, they're both crumbled.