Difference jokes

What is the difference between me and a fire?

It's hot.

What's the difference between your mum and the Twin Towers?

I would smash the Twin Towers.

What is the difference between the Twin Towers and Elton John?

Elton John is still standing.

What’s the difference between my sister-in-law and a driveway?

I pull out of the driveway.

What's the difference between the Queen's death and Princess Diana's death? The Queen died in peace, not pieces.

What's the difference between 63 cents and Princess Diana?

It's easier to scrape up 63 cents.

What’s the difference between a brick and redheads? Bricks get laid.

What's the difference between a normal person's funeral and a person with polio?

The pose!

Your mum is so fat, she needs 3 different watches for 3 different time zones.

What's the difference between sex and gender?

You can't have gender with your sister.

What's the difference between a crumbled man and 9/11... nothing, they're both crumbled.

What’s the difference between video games and my dad?

My dad doesn’t beat me.

What’s the difference between a cancer patient and a British news reporter in the South?

They usually don’t live to tell the tale.

What is the difference between Nicole Brown Simpson and cancer?

OJ couldn’t kill cancer.

Difference between Texas and Flint, Michigan?

Nothing, no one cares how much lead is in those kids.

What is the difference between a black man and Jew?

One was born burnt.

What's the difference between John Wayne and Jack Daniels?

Jack Daniels is still killing Indians.

Why are Americans so good at solving Rubik's Cubes?

Because they're good at separating colors.

Uremn es abarancin yngnumma gety asuma qshi tun?

What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you?

Pull the pin and throw it back.