Dick jokes
McDonald's worker be like, "Hello, would you like a Mc-Dick?" (You looked down) You: "Uhh, where's my dick?"
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
My I.
May I who?
May I put this pussy on your mouth?
Watching porn.
Watching porn blow my dick like a basset horn.
Your momma's so nasty, she sucked your daddy's dick and kissed you good night!
Why is my sister horny? It's because she loves my dick.
Yo mama is so nasty that she sucked your dad's dick and came in to kiss you goodnight.
Why do physically challenged gay men suck dick better than females who are able-bodied and heterosexual?
Because physically challenged gay men do it best! 👏 🙌 👍👍 👌 👌 💪 💪 🥰 😊 😃 😄 😁 😍 💖 ❤️ 💖 ❣️ 💕 💘
Oliver Savage.
So this is how I got divorced.
On my birthday my boss, who was a hot sexy woman who I have always had an eye on her huge ass and tits, wished me happy birthday and took me to her house. She went into the shower and came out dressed and this made me disappointed. But then she stripped off and made my dick go into her pussy and before I could realize I heard her main door creak. And in came my wife, mum, and my 2 kids, 8 years old and 12 years old. Although my wife joined in, she was mad after since that was not my wife, that was my wife's twin sister. Do not know why woman these days are like this!!!!!!!!!!
What happens if you mix a dick with a potato?
You get a dictator dic-dick-tator-potato!
My dick said that your ass is having a boner.
You gotta give it to JD Vance. He is consistent; he is Putin his dick where it don't belong!
Well, somebody has to cushion the blow.
I come in from work to see my wife dead on the sofa. As I unzip for one last ride, she says, "BOO!" What kind of a dick fuck does that!
What's long, white, and thick? My dick.
What did Paul Revere yell during a full moon?
The British are cumming! The British are cumming!
What do you get when you cross a penis and a potato? A dick tater.
Why did the man cross the road?
Because his dick was stuck in the chicken!
When you get to feel a dick in you, then suck bro, all your stress [goes] out the window.
Somebody’s son said, "Mom, my dick has white stuff coming out of it." She said, "Oh, good one, son, so when’s the baby coming?"
A girl did squats everyday with a 20 pound weight in her hand to finally text her boyfriend, "Show me your dick now!"