Depression

Depression jokes

Friend

You never think of how people will react to an event. My friend gets discounts at any store he goes to.

Cereal

Tiktoker: I will kill anyone who pours milk before cereal.

Depressed kid tiktok reply: *pours milk before cereal, pours cereal then takes a bite* I'll wait.

Terrorist

I didn't mean to call an Afghanistan hotline. I told them I was depressed, then they asked if I know how to drive a truck. I don't know how that has anything to do with it!

People

Why can't depressed people make depression jokes? Because they can't talk if they are dead.

Piece

When I feel depressed, I like to cut myself another piece of cake.

Super man

What do you call someone who wants to jump off a building?

Cause they want to become Super Man.

Painkiller

There are painkillers, but they only relieve physical pain. I wish something could relieve my internal pain.

Suicide

A depressed kid didn't succeed at suicide and said, "I'm a failure at suicide, too."

Feather

Which one fell first?

The depressed kid or the feather? Look at 1st comment to see answer.

Bed

I might not be able to make my bed, but at least I can get out of it.

People

Do depressed people hate swimming?

They hate it because they are already drowning in their depression, but they love it because it might make all their dreams come true.

Life

(To a thief) If you like taking things, how about you take my life?

Plate

Throw a plate.

It’s broken, right?

Say “sorry” to it.

Did it fix back?

No... that’s the same thing you did to me :)