Depression jokes
"Knock knock?"
"Who's there?"
"Depression"
"Depression wh-"
ME!! *runs away*
Imagine this scenario: a doctor walks in and tells the patient that he has all the illnesses in the world like this: "You have depression, diarrhea, cancer,... etc." and then the last one on the list is that he is deaf.
Friend #1: "What's your favourite thing about trees?"
Friend #2: "Apples"
Me: "I can hang myself in them."
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I’m a cashier at a grocery store, and when I’m bored, I draw on my hands with a pen. Well, this guy walks up to me and says, “You know, I got mental illnesses from drawing on myself.”
And so, without thinking, I said, “Well, I’ve already got those, so I think I’m fine...” 😳 He looked concerned. Oops lol.
What's a depressed kid's least favorite game?
Cut the rope.
what happens when the president turns emo?
the great depression.
I can't fake the smile for long, as there is weight hanging at both of its ends called depression.
What's the most annoying thing in the world?
When you're told you're still qualified to live.
Why did the student at Blacktown Girls cross the road? To go to heaven. HAHAHA
(demons in my head) I laugh to meet them...
OTHERS (MOTIVATED): If I had FLYING as a SUPERPOWER, FALLING would be the BEGINNING STAGE.
ME (DEPRESSED): OK, GOOD IDEA! LETS FALL OFF THE CLIFF AND FLY TO HEAVEN!!
what do you call a shadow stalker REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
My wife told me she was fat and depressed. She asked me to compliment her, so I said, "You have perfect eyesight!"
Call me a bad economy with high interest rates and low spending, 'cause I'm in a great depression.
How do you make the grass cut itself?
Make it depressed.
You can understand depression if you are still in school and get bullied by bullies, punished by teachers, and scolded by parents for being that quiet kid who says nothing.
I used to suffer from depression but through hard work, persistence, and never giving up..\n\nI now suffer from anxiety AND depression :\
Your PP is small, just like my will to live.
I have it.