Depression jokes

My life is so meaningless that I committed a crime just to get shot. 0-0

This is not a joke; this is just about death...

How do you get an emo out of the tree?

You cut the rope.

Everyone thought I'd have a great year...

14 years just gave me more chances.

On a winter day many play.

Some with snow, and I with ice Used as a device to slice Somehow I'm colder now.

Happiness belonged to you, then gave you depression.

Me: "WYD?"

Her: "Just dealing with a lot: depression, anxiety, and the feeling that I'll never be enough."

Me: "Without me? Lol"

DEPRESSION SPEEDRUN starter-kit:

* Parental issues * Money problems * Genetic likeliness * Horrible friends * Annoying neighbors/classmates * School * Being alive * Actually being a good person for once * Giving a f#ck * War-ridden area * All future options kinda suck

Would a depressed person enjoy a cat scratch? After all, it's a free slice.

Depressed person: *chokes on food* *involuntary coughs untill they can breathe* "AWWW I failed the race!!"

Do not sort... that's bad... *sigh in depression*

Pierre Poilievre has lost the government position he had for 20 years.

Bet he wishes his mom HAD used that coat hanger.

Kentucky yacht services (kys.com)

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To get to the other side.

Did you know some people don't put on masks because they wanna act like something? Some put masks on to show their depression and feeling.

Am I the only one here that actually tried to kill myself 15 times and failed every time and landed up in the hospital every time?

Chris Benoit is like a depressed orphan because he killed his family.

Don't say you want to eat out a five-year-old's pussy, because I have already shoved a glass dildo in her tight ass pussy, UwU.

My mom loved taking pics of me when I was a child. Thanks to that, people really believe my fake smiles! :3

You're a good soldier Choosing your battles Pick yourself up and dust yourself off and back in the saddle You're on the front line Everyone's watching You know it's serious we're getting closer, this isn't over The pressure is on You feel it But you've got it all Believe it When you fall get up oh oh And if you fall get up oh oh Tsamina mina zangalewa 'Cause this is Africa Tsamina mina eh eh Waka waka eh eh Tsamina mina zangalewa This time for Africa Listen to your God This is our motto Your time to shine don't wait in line y vamos por todo People are raising Their expectations Go on and feed them this is your moment no hesitations Today's your day I feel it You paved the way Believe it If you get down get up oh oh When you get down get up eh eh Tsamina mina zangalewa This time for Africa Tsamina mina eh eh Waka waka eh eh Tsamina mina zangalewa Anawa aa Tsamina mina eh eh Waka waka eh eh Tsamina mina zangalewa This time for Africa Ame la mejole biggi biggi mubbo wa A to Z Asi tsu zala makyuni biggi biggi mubbo from East to West Asi waga waga ma eh eh waga waga ma eh eh Tendency suna tsibuye 'cause this is Africa (Africa, Africa Africa) Tsamina mina, Anawa a a Tsamina mina Tsamina mina, Anawa a a Tsamina mina, eh eh Waka waka, eh eh Tsamina mina zangalewa Anawa a a Tsamina mina, eh eh Waka waka, eh eh Tsamina mina zangalewa This time for Africa Django eh eh Django eh eh Tsamina mina zangalewa Anawa a a Django eh eh Django eh eh Tsamina mina zangalewa Anawa a a This time for Africa This time for Africa We're all Africa We're all Africa

What do you call a cat with two legs instead of four?

Dead and without use, that's what I feel like.