Depression

Depression jokes

I was walking today and I saw an emo with a noose looking up at a tree. I simply said, "Hang on there, bud!"

My friend was feeling low today, so I went up to her and said, "You know, I would hang in there if I was you, swaying through life." I don't think she likes me now.

A father bought his depressed son a new house, and then pointing at it, he said, "Hang in there, son!"

I am going to be a ghost for Halloween. I actually want to be a ghost every day, because at least I'd be dead.

How many innocent succulents have been brutally killed by people trying to cure their depression?

For me, the best part of depression is remaining charming around strangers but saving the misery for the ones who love you.

Me: I have depression.

Someone: You should get out more! Go outside!

Me: *goes to the beach* Now it's a tropical depression.

Me: "WYD?"

Her: "Just dealing with a lot: depression, anxiety, and the feeling that I'll never be enough."

Me: "Without me? Lol"

I forgot you can't make depression jokes outside of Twitter, lmao. My coworker was like, "You ready for this year to be over?"

I was like, "I'm ready for this life to be over." He was like, "Bro, what?"

How to tell if you're depressed? You came to a website called "worst jokes ever.com" looking for a quick smile.

I was in a motivational seminar about depression the other day, and she said I could be anything I wanted to be if I put my mind to it. Sometimes you just have to bite the bullet and do it, even if it's messy.

What's the difference between a bridge and a burrito?

I can't jump off a burrito.

Depressed procrastinators feel like they wanna kill themselves sometime soon.