Delivery jokes
There was a person inside who needed help from the police, but the police changed their number, so he ordered a party with pizzas from 2 airplanes, but the pilots were stupid, so they put people instead of pizzas, and one landed on the 93rd floor and the 94th floor, literally.
The towers ordered pepperoni but got plane.
Why were the Twin Towers mad? They ordered pepperoni pizza, and all they got was plane.
You know the song "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus"? Apparently, Santa's the mailman.
Why were the people during 9/11 mad because they ordered pepperoni sandwiches, but they got two planes?
Anyone seen these lately?
What [is] another name for an abortion?
Canceling your delivery.
What do you call Dominos when it doesn't know how to cook pizza?
Domi-don't-knows...
What is the difference between an orphan and a mailman?
The mailman goes home at the end of the day.
What do you call a sexually attracted pizza who spoons another pizza?
A Topping.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Mail man.
Mailman who?
Bitch, do you want your mail?
My mom told me to make my dad smile, and she will give me $100, so I said, "The Cowboys are gonna win the Super Bowl." He smiled, but my mom didn't give it to me.
Anyways, I forgot about my package coming, and the mailman came, and I said, "I like your hat; teal looks nice on you," and he smiled, and my mom gave me $100.
"I've only been ripped off twice in my life. The first time was when I ordered three kebabs and they only delivered two. The second time was when we signed Cristiano Ronaldo."
-Al Nassr owner
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Pizza.
Pizza who?
Never mind, it was so cheesy.
What did the Buddhist say to the pizza delivery boy?
"Make me one with everything."
I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon....I'll let you know.
Did you hear about the delivery boy that worked for that Italian Restaurant down the street?
Yeah, he Pasta-Way.
How do you call on a mail man who is carrying rotten fruit?
Come post!
Reverend Mother walks into the convent and announces:
"Sisters, our carrots have been delivered!"
Nuns exclaim: "Hurray! Carrots!"
Reverend Mother: "They are grated carrots, though."
Nuns: "Ugh! No, thank you then..."
I can't believe this!
Pizza is round and it comes in a square box, and you cut it into a triangle.
Your forehead is so big that your mom stayed in the delivery room just to give birth to your head.