Where would you take Stephen hawking if he dies, the funeral directors or PC world
What happens when Stephen hawking dies? The windows shutdown sound plays.
Give a man a plane ticket and he'll fly for a day. Push a man from a plane and he'll fly for the rest of his life.
I hate how funerals are always at 9 a.m. -- I'm not really a mourning person.
"Dad, how do stars die?" -- "Usually an overdose."
My aunt's star sign was cancer, pretty ironic how she died. -- She was eaten by a giant crab.
How do you tell when your wife is dead?
The sex is the same, but the dishes pile up.
What do classical musicians do when they die?
They decompose.
What was the last thought Jesus had before he died?
"Man, I could really use a crowbar right about now."
For sale: Dead Canary.
Not going cheep.
