Dark jokes
Dark Humor is like a child with cancer. It never gets old.
Dark humour : hell!!! Aren't people racist!!!
The Middle Ages were called the dark ages because there were too many knights.
How do you know you've found a priest? When little Timmy is glued to his crotch.
Why did the chicken enter the cave?
Because it wanted to get to the Dark Side.
Here’s another joke my friend told me.
What did the school shooter do when the librarian told him to be quiet? Pulled out a silencer.
Kid: "Dark humor is like a mother's love."
Orphan: "How?"
Kid: "You wouldn't know."
Orphan: "........."
This is bullshit! Stop showing cheesy and dumb jokes! This website is for dark humor, insults, and morbid content! All of you who don’t talk about the following, go die!
Dark humor leave if sensitive: Wives are like grenades: pull the ring, and the house is gone.
What's the quickest way to get to the hospital? Just stand in the middle of a busy road.
What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.
What do my dad and Nemo have in common? They both can't be found.
What do you do after raping a deaf person? Cut their fingers off so they don't tell anyone.
MORE JOKES COMING SOON LMAO ;]
Me: Dark humor jokes are like a mother's love.
Orphan: How come?
Me: You wouldn't get it.
Orphan: . . . .
I never do dark jokes, but when I feel like it, I prefer orphan jokes, 'cause they're the safest option. I mean, what are they gonna do, call their parents?
How many children does it take to change a lightbulb?
Not 15, as my basement's still dark.
God, my dad got so pissed during 9/11.
All that work wasted.
An Englishman, a Frenchman, a ravishing blonde, and an old lady are sharing a compartment on a train as it winds its way through the Alps. Every now and then the train passes through a tunnel, during which time the compartment is plunged into complete darkness. On one such occasion, a ringing slap is heard, and as the train passes back into daylight, the Frenchman is rubbing his sore, red cheek.
The old lady thinks, "I bet that dirty Frenchman fondled the blonde, and she struck the pervert."
The blonde thinks, "I bet that filthy Frenchman was looking to grope me in the dark, mistook the old lady for me, and she slapped him."
The Frenchman thinks, "I bet that perfidious Englishman touched up the blonde in the dark, and she slapped me by mistake."
The Englishman thinks, "I can't wait for another tunnel so I can slap that French twat again."
How many dead strippers does it take to change a light?
At least 13 because my basement is still dark.
Today was like every other day. It was so terribly long and so terribly dreary. I fear these feelings will never end. I’ll always feel so dark, feel so hopeless. Sometimes all I want is for it to end. For all of it to end, for all of my thoughts to end. I despise the way that always comes to mind. But I feel so lost, feel so hopeless. If something would just work. But nothing has worked. Nothing can fix this. These feelings will pass. These days won't feel so endless... or so absolutely heavy. Just give it some time. Just give it some hope... and some belief. The ‘happy pills’ will work. The doctor says they'll help... they'll help it go away. Just dump the pill in your hand. Let yourself place the little white thing on your tongue... Let yourself throw your head back and swallow. It'll make this better. It should make me feel better.
Everything has changed! The world is so bright— The world is so loud! I don’t know how I never noticed! The sun is so warm— The grass is so green! I feel so awake! I feel so content— I feel so happy! It’s so strange! I’m not anxious— I’m not overthinking! I guess those pills really worked! I think I’m really getting better— I think I’m really going to be happy!
Why doesn’t the orphan have any toys? Because his Lego figures ran away too.
Dark jokes are like clean water, not everyone gets it.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To die.