Dark jokes
How do you find a black person in the dark without a flashlight?
Tell them a joke to make them smile.
How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb?
More than five because my basement is still dark.
My grandpa said, "You kids rely on too much electronics." I said, well we will see about that. *unplugging life support* me: *oops*
Dr. Seuss dark jokes.
Hey there little mister, I'm dating your sister!
What's an emo's favorite Pink Floyd album?
The Final Cut.
Why do white people get abducted by aliens?
Because they're easier to see in the dark.
My favorite dark joke is orphan jokes. For no apparent reason.
(If you see this joke with a blue "S" that's also me. I just have an acc now.)
This is bullshit! Stop showing cheesy and dumb jokes! This website is for dark humor, insults, and morbid content! All of you who don’t talk about the following, go die!
Q. How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A. Gotta be more than 9 'cause my basement is still dark.
Dark humor leave if sensitive: Wives are like grenades: pull the ring, and the house is gone.
How many retards does it take to change a lightbulb? None! They are still too busy trying to turn off the dark.
Click...uh Click..........,.UH!!
Confucius say, never try win head-butting contest with mongoloid: you’ll lose every time and only hurt yourself.
(mono gloid? mong a’ loid squeals)
Did you hear the one about the dog raised by retards?
All he’d do is go “Uh-f, uh-f....Ooohhhh!”
Dark humor jokes about orphans are funny because no parents are gonna be told.
Kid asks, "What is dark humor?" Me *points*, "See that guy across the street..." Kid: "I can't... I'm blind." Me: "Exactly."
Why were the Middle Ages called the Dark Ages?
Because there were too many knights.
God, when terminally ill children beg him to heal them:
God: No, I don’t want to.
Why are most dark jokes about orphans?
They can't complain to their parents.
A housewife takes a lover during the day, while her husband is at work, not aware that her 9-year-old son was hiding in the closet. Her husband came home unexpectedly, so she hid her lover in the closet. The boy now has company.
Boy: "Dark in here." Man: "Yes, it is." Boy: "I have a baseball." Man: "That's nice." Boy: "Want to buy it?" Man: "No, thanks." Boy: "That's my dad outside." Man: "How much did you say the baseball was again?" Boy: "$250."
In the next few weeks, it happens again that the boy and the mom's lover are in the closet together.
Boy: "Dark in here." Man: "Yes, it is." Boy: "I have a baseball glove." Man: "That's nice." Boy: "Want to buy it?" Man: "No, thanks." Boy: "I think I just remembered something I needed to tell my dad." Man: "How much did you say the glove was again?" Boy: "$750." Man: "Fine."
A few days later, the father says to the boy, "Grab your glove. Let's go outside and toss the baseball!" The boy says, "I can't. I sold them." The father asks, "How much did you sell them for?" The son says, "$1,000." The father says, "It's terrible to overcharge your friends like that. That is way more than those two things cost. I'm going to take you to church and make you confess."
They go to church and the father alerts the priest and makes the little boy sit in the confession booth and closes the door.
The boy says, "Dark in here." The priest says, "Do not start that shit again!"
How many children does it take to change a lightbulb?
Not 15, as my basement's still dark.
Dark humor is like water. It exists.
What's the best part about dead baby jokes?
They never get old.