Dark jokes
Why were glow-in-the-dark condoms made?
To play Star Wars.
What do you call a black person?
Dark humor.
Everyone becomes happy when they complete the last stage of the game.
But the cancer patients aren't.
Friday's opening is open. Religion: "Dark model?" Hopi, Kahan, Virra, Sayla, Salafa, Sales, Power, Sleep. Google is “that cave”.
What does “JETS” stand for?
Jihadis Eradicating The Skyscrapers.
How many police officers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two: one to change the lightbulb, and the other to open fire while the room is dark.
Trying to find a good parking spot is a lot like trying to find a girlfriend.
If you can’t find one, you stick it in the disabled spot and hope nobody finds out.
What do you call five Black people having sex?
Threesome.
My jokes are so dark that I am surprised that the cops didn't shoot them yet.
My dad told me a joke one time. When I realized the joke, the second tower was hit.
How many emo kids does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they just like hanging in the dark.
You know how bad of a person you are when you figure out how long you wait to smash. For me and my girlfriend, it was between the first plane crash and the last tower falling.
What’s the difference between dark jokes and cotton?
Some people don’t pick it.
What game do emo kids love the most?
Hangman.
I saw my wife at the dam yesterday, which sucks because I wanted her to flow further down.
Q: What is the difference between two bottles of Whiskey and 2 pretty feminist girls?
A: You don't leave the bottles in the cold and dark forest after you and your 9 friends are finished with them.
Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light.
Kelly Clarkson may be able to shed her weight [through pills], but she will never be able to shed the fact that she admitted herself that she molested her children when they were toddlers.
Sometimes I think back on all the people I’ve lost and remember why I stopped being a tour guide.
Give a man a match, and he’ll be warm for a few hours. Set him on fire, and he’ll be warm for the rest of his life.
You don’t need a parachute to go skydiving. You need a parachute to go skydiving twice.
My grandfather said my generation relies too much on the latest technology. I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.
I’ll never forget my father’s last words to me just before he died: “Are you sure you fixed the brakes?”
I took my 5 year old son to ride some roller coasters. I think he didn’t like it because I challenged him to a no hands contest.
He said, "But I don’t have any." He wanted to know what dark humor is. Now he knows what it is and what it feels like.