Dark jokes

Politician

  • Have you ever heard of the Russian politician who was so afraid of the dark that, instead of going to the bathroom at night, he would use a metal tin that he kept underneath his bed?

    His name is Vladimir Pootin.

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  • Kid

  • There was one kid that came home from school and asked his mom what dark humor was.

    She said, "Well son, do you see that guy over there across the road? Go give him a high-five."

    Son said, "But I can't see."

    Mom said, "That's the point."

  • 3
  • Doctor

  • DARK ALERT********

    A girl went to the doctor. The doctor said she had one year to live. She shot the doctor, and the judge gave her 15 years.

    DARK ALERT********

    Hooker

  • What did the hooker say when she found out the cash she was paid with for services rendered was counterfeit?

    I've been raped!

  • 1
  • Dog

  • I told Siri about my dog, and she told me if she could tell me a joke to cheer me up, and I said okay.

    She asked me, "Knock knock." I said, "Who is there?" She said, "Not your dog."

    Rape

  • There are women complaining about being r@ped.

    JUST DON'T GO NEAR DARK ALLEYS WITH A SPORTS BRA ON. 😁

  • 1
  • Hospital

  • What's the quickest way to get to the hospital? Just stand in the middle of a busy road.

    What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

    What do my dad and Nemo have in common? They both can't be found.

    What do you do after raping a deaf person? Cut their fingers off so they don't tell anyone.

    MORE JOKES COMING SOON LMAO ;]

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  • 9/11

  • I hate jokes about 9/11... every joke has the tendency to crash and burn.

    "I didn't get the joke at first, but then it hit me like a plane," the joke was so dark a cop almost shot it.

  • 1