Dark Humor
Q. How do U get the emo out of the tree?
A. Cut the rope.
Why can't Mexicans play Uno?
Because they can't get a green card.
A woman went out on a date and said, “I’m thirty-one with the body of a sixteen-year-old.” The man responded, “Wanna show me? 😏” The woman took him back to her house and opened her freezer and said, “Take a look.”
Dark jokes are just like water.
Not everybody gets it.
The other day I commented a dark humor joke on a post about a guy who lost his best friend. The joke was “I was so drunk last night I threw a mushroom at a midget and said ‘grow mario grow.’” He commented “What the hell is wrong with you?” and I said “IKR I really gotta work on my alcoholic issues.”
He then replied “This is a post about my dead best friend get the fuck off my feed I don’t even know you.” And so I said “Well then get to know me, I could become your new best friend!”
Note to all.
My name is Lariah. Lariah Carla Brown, 14 years old and I am 1 of triplets. I don't understand how rape jokes are funny, and I just want to make that statement clear. I also hate orphan jokes because I WAS one. Notice when I put WAS! I also see jokes about cancer, now I know you can't be kidding. You know that cancer is a disease that many people get and could die from, so you are just wrong about that!
A cannibal went to the dietitian, and he got told to eat more vegetables, so he ate a disabled person.
Where did Sally go when the bomb went off?
Everywhere.
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
She had no arms.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not Sally.
It must not be a good suicide story if you can tell it.
Friend: How dark IS your humor?
Me: It started an organization against cops.
Why did the emo step in front of a car? To get to the other side.
Who wants me to bring back the daily School Shooter Jokes?
What's the difference between 100 dead babies and a Lamborghini?
I don't have a Lamborghini.
Why do orphans get offended by dark humor?
It doesn’t hit home.
Once there was a girl named Sally! She had no arms or legs, was mute, deaf, and blind.
Knock knock Who’s there? Not Sally.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends how hard you throw them.
My wife told me she'll slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off the computer. I'm not too worried, I think she's joking.
How do you help a suicidal person cheer up?
You tell them it's a leap of faith.
I went to the store and I saw a kid with fake airpods, and I was going to tell him, "Nice fake airpods," but it was his hearing aids.
What's the difference between anal rape and a microwave?
A microwave won't brown your meat.