You're so fat, when you fall, the sidewalk cracks.
Me testing if there is fall damage in real life (falls off of a cliff, uses water bucket trick) dies.
A Lew runs into a wall, what does he break? His Nose.
A Mexican runs into a wall, what does he break? His lawn mower.
Apparently I'm not allowed home after house fires, but the neighbors, their house burnt lovely.
I once told an orphan to go big or go home. He replied, "I can't get home; it got bombed."
If you tried to look at your hairline in a mirror, it would shatter into 100,000,000,000 pieces.
How is a marriage like a hurricane?
In the beginning, there’s a lot of sucking and blowing, but at the end, you lose your house.
What's blue and bad for your teeth?
A green brick that's painted blue after the original paint dries (it takes a little while to dry), but after it dries you can paint it and then it will be green. If the brick is green it is called a green brick as it is green (not blue anymore) and it hurts your teeth because brick is a hard material that can damage the bones in your mouth (also known as your teeth).
What can you break, even if you never pick it up or touch it?
My jacket tore a little bit. It's a ripper.
Q: What do a blond girl and a tornado have in common A: There's a lot of blowing and sucking then u lose your house
Study tip: Laminate your notes so they don't get damaged by the tears!
As an American, I like cars. And like all car enthusiasts, even just a little scratch can ruin a brand new car.
So why is it that we go to different countries like India and see that almost every car is completely totaled? I guess we have different meanings of "it's just a scratch."
What do you call a sociopath who damages a box of Wheaties? A cereal criminal!
Why is it painful to have your attorney with you in the hospital?
The damages are severe.
I broke the sink yesterday; the handle just blew right off! My dad was so mad, he blew his stack!
I felt a window break once. It was pane-full!
Why should you never throw grandpa's false teeth at a vehicle? You might denture car.
I made an AR that shoots boo boo bullets. It does poison time 10x damage. You have a very good chance of getting STD. Very good AR. Going for 100,000. Email: EatandDrinkbouls@gmail.com
What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence?
Time to get a new fence!
