Knock knock.
Whose there
Not your dad
A dad and son walk into a strip club. The people in the strip club said he was too young to be in here, so they had to leave. Ten years later, they went back there. They saw a small dancer. The father walked over there and said the woman looked too small to be in here. Her reply was... "I wasn't dancing ten years ago."
I went to ask my friend's mom if I could have a sleepover.
Then I remembered they did not have a mom or dad.
What's the difference between when I opened the window in a car wash and when Kawhi Leonard did it? At least my dad didn't get shot in the eye.
Dad: Are you gay?
Kid: Yes.
10 days later.
Kid: I’m going to my girlfriend's house.
Dad: I thought you were gay?
Kid: What’s wrong with you? He’s the girly girl of our relationship, dumba**.
Dad: Don’t swear and okay, bud.
For this orphan, his dad didn't only go and get the milk. His mom did too.
Little Johnny went up to his mom and said: "Can I have some milk?"
He waited for three hours to get an answer.
His mom finally said: "No, your dad still isn't back with it."
The reason why people are short is because their dad never came back with the milk.
What do the twin towers and my ex-girlfriend have in common? They both went down on my dad.
People joking about 9/11 Random kid you shouldn’t joke about that I lost my dad on 9/11 Oh Yeah he was the greatest pilot ever
A dad is in a wheelchair and his daughter goes, "Don't step on a crack!"