Culture jokes
Yo' mama sometimes always happens to let you know you're back in New York -- like the way people order in a restaurant: "Could you take my order before Jesus gets back? What's the matter with you? I've evolved into another species here, you understand? I can't eat clam chowder no more. I gotta see the cyborg menu, you understand?"
Why do the Greeks and Romans like food? Because food is good for you.
What do you call a Mexican that lost his car?
Carlos.
What did the hematologist say when his Canadian patient wrote that he's blood type "eh"? "Ah, probably just go with blood typo!"
Why are Indians dark?
Because they are born and bred in chicken curry.
Why are Bengalis so fishy?
Because the fish ate them on a daily basis.
That one awkward moment you have to go ask your Chinese neighbor if they've seen your dog.
Q: How do you know an Asian person was in your house?
A: Your homework is done, breakfast is made, and your cat is gone.
What do you call an Indian babysitter?
Nanny.
If you are talking to an Indian and notice a red dot appear on their forehead, be careful of what you said... They are recording it down... Careful... (no offense) pure joke.
Soy un chacho.
So I made a parody for "Me, Myself, and I." It goes like this: "Me, Myself, and I, I'm gonna drink bleach until I die!"
Why was the Chinese laundry joke not funny? It had no irony.
Q: What do you call a Mexican man that lost his car?
A: Carlos.
Why do the French eat snails?
They don’t like fast food!
When a white person says the n word,
black people: "Y'all mother fu...rs ain't gonna believe dis shit."
When the Mexican wanted to go shopping,
he went to Ja-mall.
Puerto Rican teen: I'm a waste, a failure, NUNCA LO PODRA ASER (I'll never be able to do it).
The mother: AI NINO (OH CHILD).
The teen: QUE? (WHAT?)
The mother: NO TE PONGA CON ESTA MIELDA OTRAVES! (DON'T START WITH THIS SHIT AGAIN!)
The teen: I CAN'T DO SHIT RIGHT MAMA!
The mother: OOOHHH YEAH WELL TU SI PUEDES ABLAR MIELDA DE TI, I BOTAR BASURA! (YOU SURE CAN TALK CRAP ABOUT YOURSELF AND THROW OUT THE TRASH.)
The teen: QUAL (WHICH).
The mother: MADRE DE DIOS (MOTHER OF GOD).
The teen: AVIA UNA NEGRA I OTRA BLANKA (THERE WAS A BLACK ONE AND WHITE ONE).
*A phone buzzes.*
The teen: Whose phone is that, ma?
Unknown: MR. PRESIDENT IF YOU TAKE AWAY THE CONFEDERATE FLAG HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW WHO THE BAD WHITE PEOPLE ARE?
*Runs to bag, opens white one and sticks hand in.*
The teen: HAIR GEL
Being bullied by an artist? Want them to leave you alone?
www.VincentVanGoghAway.com
What's a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross country.