Crime jokes
When you go to the priest's basement, you will always find the pope's body and his children in the corner of the room.
Yesterday I had a party.
I got questioned about five dead kids locked up in a box.
I did that when I was 13. Damn, I forgot about them!
My builder was extending my basement when he questioned me because he found three dead kids in a corner tied together.
What's the same about boxes and children?
They're both found in basements.
Teacher: How many kids are in this classroom?
Kid: 73 if you count the ones you have hid in the basement.
How would Stephen Hawking get rid of the police?
Go to the junkyard.
My uncle is a computer genius! The police even called him a PDF file!
What is the most common crime in China?
Identity fraud.
What did the pretty young pre-pubescent 14 year old boy say when he got a homosexual pedophile for Christmas?
He said he was awfully touched!
What's a paedophile's favorite footwear?
White Vans.
I was accused of rape, but I swear she was a whore.
Rape jokes are not funny.
Look at my name by the way😁.
How did we know Princess Diana had dandruff?
'Cause the police found her Head and Shoulders on the dash.
My grandpa's last words were, "Why is there a body in my kitchen?"
No witnesses.
I love murder shows... wish me luck cause I'm kinda hoping to be on one one day.
Orphan kids only play GTA5 so they can be wanted.
I was talking to my friend, and he said, "I lost my virginity to a girl, and then she stopped coming to school." And I said, "Probably because she was fired."
Why did the cake say to the scammer? "I'll scam you up!"
Why did the orphan play GTA? Because he wanted to feel the wanted level.
We the jury are yet to deliver our final verdict, but we would like to have a guess.
Is it Mrs. Peacock with the candlestick in the library?