Creation jokes

Why can't religion and science agree?

Because science creates skyscrapers, and religion combines with skyscrapers.

Today, I invented a new word: "plagiarism."

How were tire swings made?

A tire said, "Goodbye world," and hung himself.

Men and women are not equal, speaking biologically and mentally. I don't care what other feminists say. Men are naturally physically stronger, while women are more mentally stable (sometimes). The internet and the media will lie. You feminists say that you are stronger. Well, you wish. You can't hit a girl because she is more sensitive, but she says she is stronger. Like, what the hell?

We're not sexist men; you're sexist women. And BTW, you'll rot in hell for hating God's creation. And also, men were created before women. Search it up in the Bible or online.

A woman prayed to be a mother everyday for many years until she crossed a road without looking and got hit by a woman driver and died.

When she met God, she asked Him, "How come you didn't answer my prayers?"

God replied, "I did. I kept sending men to rape you, but you kept on choosing to destroy my creations by having an abortion."

I made a website for orphans.

It has no homepage.

God needed an extra two hands to make your fat ass of a mother.

What did Eve say to Adam?

"That is rock hard."

God: I feel like I'm forgetting something... oh no, Earth! *sees it on fire* Oh, it's fine.

People of Earth: *running and screaming*

Santen: *to God* Really?

Why doesn't Newton cut trees in vanilla Minecraft? Because he wants Minecraft to be realistic!

I sat down and wrote a joke.

The dear God created the man.

Then he created woman.

When he then saw what he had done, he took care of tobacco and alcohol.

Why did God steal a rib from Adam and make a woman out of it?

God wanted to show that nothing sensible can come of stealing!

What did God say when he made the first black man?

"Crap, I burnt one!"

Adam and Eve are wondering whether they are black or white. Eve says, "Why don't you go and ask God?"

So Adam goes into the Garden of Eden and shouts out to God, "Are we black or white?" A big booming voice bellows out, "You are what you are."

He immediately goes back to Eve and tells her that they are white. "How do you know?" asks Eve. "Because he said, 'You are what you are,'" Adam replied. "Why does that mean we are white?" asked Eve. "Because if we were black, He would have said, 'You is what you is.'"

Ex Of Johnnys: I have a question.

Johnny: What?

Ex Of Johnnys: Am I pretty?

Johnny: Yes ofc jesus made everybody wonderfully!

Ex: Awhh!

Johnny: But whoever made you was painting Thomas the Train while making your face.

Sister: Why does shampoo have directions?

Me: 'Cause God made you.

What's the difference between you and Frankenstein?

He is not ugly like you; plus, he has a wife.

Adam and Eve had 3 male children, the only children on Earth. How did they reproduce?

What was the first man made out of? Adams! (Atoms)