Cow jokes
Wow, these cow jokes are moo-amazing!
I would curse at you, but my country praises cows.
WOULD YOU RATHER:
Eat 20 lbs of cow s**t?
or
Drink a gallon of sperm?
Q: What do you get when the cow jumped over the barbed wire? A: Udder destruction!
What is the difference between a cow and a chicken?
It's white and it's brown.
Why did the Orphan punch the other orphan?
Because the orphan broke his leg then had to get a retirement fund, so then he farted and got 1m dollars in cash, so then he started eating his toe jam and thought it tasted really good, so he started selling it to Taco Bell, then ate a cow. All the sudden he was attacked by hangry aliens then gave them some toe jam. They loved it, so they farted there way back up to space where they were eating Harold's fresh toe jam. It was so good, then one of the aliens ate there dog, so had to go the dollar tree to get it out then started gagging on one of the aliens' 2 meter defeater, and then the Orphan made out with the other Orphan and had a wedding at playground sharting happily ever after.
What did The Notorious B.I.G. say to the cow?
- MOO MONEY MOO PROBLEMS
Why did the cow have for breakfast?
Answer: Muesli.
What did the baby cow say to the mommy cow when he saw a hamburger?
"Mommy, is that Uncle Joe?"
What does a chicken give you?
Student: Meat.
What does a pig give you?
Student: Bacon.
What does a fat cow give you?
Student: Homework.
"You're fat as a cow."
"......."
"Nope."
What do you call a herd of winning cows?
A topside.
What do you get when you kill a brown chicken and brown cow?
Dead chicken and dead cow.
What does the cow say when it's going on holiday? - MOOOOOYORK.
What do you call a cow in the snow?
Chilli Beef.
What is a cow that's good at math good for?
Meat pie.
A farm full of cows were bombed, and only two survived. All of the udders died.
A cow was standing in a corn field. The chicken walked by and said annoyingly, "What do I see here? Corned beef!?"
What do you get when you throw holy water on a cow?
A holy cow!
Q: If there were two moo cows walking down the street, where would they be going?
A: Home to see their mama!