Considered Jokes

Adin, you should consider eating pencil lead, you fat cat lover, only if you're the new Adin from FF though xoxo da babby.

Judge: We shall now sentence you for the murder of your parents.

Accused: Please consider a lenient sentence, your honor.

Judge: But why?

Accused: Because I’m an orphan.

Which planet would I consider dating?

I don’t know, but not Saturn because she’s already got a ring on her.

Hey everyone, I'm back because I'm sinking back towards depression because my sister is really being a bitch, and my parents always side with her, and the stress over online school is just getting overwhelming, and I'm seriously considering hanging myself to end it all because the pain is just... terrible, and I feel like I'm not worth life.

Man 1: I-I ran my mom over to get a stupid book.

Man 2: Aww, books aren't that bad. I'm sure she thinks you're a great son considering she can't drive anymore.

Man 1: She was in the road, and I was rushing to get the last copy of this book. She can't drive or do anything anymore.

Setting: Funeral Home

Customer: Yes, I was considering what would be the best option for cheap cremation, but I feel that's silly to ask.

Funeral Director: Oh! We do have these nice urns over here at a discounted 75 percent off.

Customer: Okay? What's the catch? That's almost 300 dollars off?

Funeral Director: I assure you these are top-of-the-line urns and will keep your loved ones' remains secure and dry.

Customer: Okay?

Funeral Director: Yep, these have only been used once, so it is absolutely worth the purchase.

By: MiniMemorials.com

If I place a slide on the edge of a cliff or a really high building, would going down it be considered "suislide"?

Asking for a friend.