Competition

Competition jokes

Me playing a game...

What did God just stop? Are hearts cause we didn't kill each other.

Like if that was good.

Two flies were playing football in a saucer. One tells the other, “You’ll need more practice if you want to play in the cup!”

Waitress: You wanna box for your leftovers?

Me: No, but I'll arm wrestle you for the check.

Why does the orange 🍊 beat the other fruits 🍎 in every race?

Because it never runs out of juice.

Guy is at athletic meet. Asks guy if he is a pole vaulter.

He replies, "No I am German and how did you know my name was Walter?"

There's a new cooking programme on BBC1. The contestants are victims of domestic violence. It's called "Can't Cook... Right Hook."

Me and my little brother were playing Call Of Duty. He wasn't doing very good, so I told him so. My brother said to me, "At least I don't have to camp in order to get kills." I then responded with, "I would call you cancer, but at least cancer kills."

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  • I caught my mom licking up and down and deep throating a banana. I said, "Why are you doing that?" She replied, "I’m doing it for practice for who could suck the best dick contest in the neighborhood."

    Friend #1: "Yo guys, what's the most unfair game you've ever played? For me it's Fortnite."

    Friend #2: "I'd have to say Monopoly."

    Me: "The most unfair game you say? Life, definitely. Like, no one wins, it's a one-way game."

    Friend #2: "Uhh...that's not exactly what he meant..."

    Friend #1: *calls the suicide hotline*