Competition jokes
What's the similarity between women and car parking spaces? The good ones are always taken, and sometimes when nobody's looking, you slip in the disabled one.
22 ants were playing football in a saucer.
One ant said to another one, “We'll have to play better tomorrow. We're playing in the cup!”
I met a guy in a wheelchair today. His face was battered and bruised. "What happened to your face?" I asked.
"I'm a Paralympian," he replied.
"Boxing?"
"No, ... hurdles."
Two artists had an art contest. It ended in a draw.
Why was Cinderella banned from playing sports? Because she always ran away from the ball.
My girlfriend and I often laugh about how competitive we are... But I laugh more.
The Somalian Olympics Team has just apologized to the Olympic Committee after realizing that sailing and shooting were two separate events.
What do sprinters eat before a race?
Nothing, they fast.
Chuck Norris wins a staring contest. -- Against Medusa.
Why doesn't Mexico compete in the Olympics?
Because all the Mexicans who can run, jump, and swim are in the U.S.
What's the difference between a silver medal and a priest?
They both came in a little behind.