Comparison jokes
An orphan is like marriage. The kid is always the reason for divorce. The kid is always the reason for his parents leaving him.
Your forehead is so large, if I drew an H on it, maybe Kobe could've landed.
What's the difference between a guy and a woman? They fall from different heights.
"Do you know the difference between wallpaper and toilet paper?" Replies, "No." "Gross!"
You're so bald, Bob Hope would refer to you as "grandpa."
Q: Why does Pewdiepie prefer knives over guns?
A: Because knives don't have barrels.
What's the difference between a prostitute and a Democrat? A prostitute will stop screwing you when you run out of money.
When I was your age, we had Wacko Jacko, not Florida Man.
What do Rapboat and Caseoh have in common?
They're both chubby.
The tables in my class are straight, but I can’t say the same thing for your hairline.
Fat people are like the Twin Towers. Once they go down, they don’t come back up.
How can you compare a gay prostitute to Pacman?
They both get paid to eat 200 balls!
The only difference between my grandma and the Twin Towers is that they collapsed faster than my grandma.
"Rapeboat" so fat it made yo momma look thin.
What's the difference between my wife and a battery? I can't use a battery when it dies.
What do Drew Bledsoe and the Twin Towers have in common?
They both got taken out by two jets.
Your forehead is so clear, like the Liberty Bell manual in 1876.
Yo mama so fat she makes the sun look like a dwarf star!
What is the difference between Jesus and the devil?
When the devil came to Earth, he was the one with the nail gun.
What is the difference between an emo kid and a cutting board?