Comparison jokes
What's the difference between a priest and McDonald's?
They both like to slide their meat between 10 year old buns.
What is the difference between a sloth and a depressed kid? A sloth doesn't need a rope to hang.
I am like Cookie Monster on steroids when it comes to cookies.
What's the difference between my mum and my dad?
My mum stayed.
Y yo body built like a half a tooth pic lol.
Roses are red. Your blood is too. You look like a monkey And belong in a zoo.
Do not worry, I will be there too. Not in the cage, But laughing at you.
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and acne? Acne doesn't come on a 5-year-old's face.
What does a dad and the Twin Towers have in common? Once they're gone they never come back.
What's the difference between kids and drugs? I don't sell drugs.
Your forehead is so big that teachers use it as a whiteboard.
What do an angler fish and a pedophile have in common?
They both like to hide in dark places, look creepy, and like to lure small creatures.
You're so short, when you were born, the doctor couldn't tell if you were a boy, a girl, or a Jimmy Dean pork sausage.
What’s the difference between an erection and Edward Holland? Nothing, they're both dicks.
What's the difference between you and my dad? You come home.
Your forehead is like my dad.
Non-existent.
What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a Mercedes?
I don’t have a Mercedes.
If I'm ugly, at least I'm not you.
What's the difference between a guy and a woman? They fall from different heights.
Why are women like KFC? After you finish with the thigh and the breasts, all you have left is the greasy box to put your bone in.
What does a kite and a criminal have in common?
They both get high.