Comparison jokes

You think my face is ugly? Yours is more.

Are you dead? Because you look like my dog.

Which is better looking, girls or women?

90,900,00,1090,279402% of girls are raped. 67% of women are raped. So I guess girls are sexier than women! Who agrees? Please comment: Good or Bad.

It looks like a runner bean, only smaller.

From the makers of Mangeone...

What is the difference between cum and milk? Nothing. They are both white and tasty.

You're like a cloud. When you go away, it's a beautiful day.

Sometimes I feel ugly, but then I think of my sister and feel better.

Yo forehead so big, NASA thought it was Mars.

What’s the difference between emos and Hitler?

Hitler didn’t post on social media when he wanted to kill himself.

Alright, I'm gonna drink the lo-carb one to see how it compares to the normal Monster.

Holy shit, it tastes just like the original one.

There's like a weird after taste though.

Kinda like a sparkling water one.

I love Monster. I've drank about 5 cans already.

Yo momma so fat, her belt size is E for Equator.

What’s the difference between Jesus and the toddler in my basement?

Jesus died a virgin.

You are so fat that Big Chungus looks like a small Chungus.

Yo hairline be lookin' like Elmo's toe fungus.

Q: I often think I'm ugly, but then I think of my sister and get over it.

"Little John, she is fat." How? He said, "Like a pig."

How is smoking similar to oral sex?

The closer to the butt you get the stronger the flavor! 🤢

You're so short that you build a tiny house for yourself.

What’s the difference between an apple and a depressed kid? The apple falls from the tree.