Cliff jokes

Riddle: A man killed his wife in his car with a knife, and no one could see him. He threw the body out of the car and threw the knife off a cliff. When he got home, the cops called the man and told him his wife was dead and to come to the scene of the crime. The man agreed and rushed to the scene. When he got there, the cops immediately arrested him. Why?

ANSWER: The cops never said where the scene of the crime is.

I have a daughter; she’s a fan. Her name is Penny. Fan she was born on the mountain Pen y Fan. I adopted her because her mum fell off the cliff after birthing Penny. It doesn’t matter, really; Penny’s mum wasn’t a big fan of her anyway.

How do you f**k a sheep?

Put your d**k in it and face it off the cliff edge. It'll keep going backwards as you push forwards.

What's a similarity between a cliff hanger and nooses?

They both leave you hanging.

If I hung myself from a cliff, would people call me a cliffhanger?

Why did the cliff feel offended?

Because George jumped OFF. ENDED his life.

(I'm sorry... No, I'm not!)

When this guy fell off a cliff, he got an A+ for egg-cellence!

Did you fall from heaven? Or did you fall from the cliff up there?

Have you heard about the lemming that jumped off a cliff into an ocean?

I heard it was because of pier pressure.

What do you call a bunch of Paki's jumping off a cliff?

Chocolate drops.

What's worse than throwing a baby off a cliff?

Catching it with a pitchfork.

I bought my blind friend a house on the edge of a cliff.

They died of happiness and a 30 story fall.

Today sucked. My friend fell off a cliff, and I went to jail.

What do you call a man with a seagull on his head?

Cliff.

A man asks to play kick the bucket (not death).

The other man agrees. They go to the top of Mt. Everest. The man who asked ties the bucket to the other one's foot. Then he kicks it off the cliff, which brings the man with it. LOL

THE END

If a person walks off a hundred-foot cliff and halfway down screams, "Why did I do that?" Then a second person walks off the same one-hundred-foot cliff and screams the same verse, "Why did I do that?" Then another person walks off the cliff and screams the same line, "Why did I do that," and the next person does the same thing. What do you call that?

(Stupid People)

What did the cookie say when he jumped off the cliff? Crumbs, ha ha!

I was watching a TV show where a guy was hanging off a cliff, then the series ended... I guess you can say that they left that guy on a cliffhanger!

I will always remember my grandpa's last words after robbing a bank: "Oh, shit! The pigs are catching up!" But the cops did not kill him; he drove full speed off a cliff.

A man came up to a girl about to jump off a cliff. The man said, "Why?" She then replies, "There are many monsters in this world, and I am one of them."