Cliff jokes
Today sucked. My friend fell off a cliff, and I went to jail.
What's a similarity between a cliff hanger and nooses?
They both leave you hanging.
What did the cookie say when he jumped off the cliff? Crumbs, ha ha!
I will always remember my grandpa's last words after robbing a bank: "Oh, shit! The pigs are catching up!" But the cops did not kill him; he drove full speed off a cliff.
If I hung myself from a cliff, would people call me a cliffhanger?
A leaf and an emo fell off a cliff, who landed first? The leaf, because the rope stopped the emo.
"Hola, soy Dora. Do you see the cliff? Say, "backpack." Tell her that we need Amanda. While I push her off the cliff, you will not peek. Did you just peek? Close your eyes, you silly goose." The end.
Why do New Zealanders have sex with sheep on the edge of cliffs? They push back harder.
You get paper cuts on each eye and walk off a cliff.
Once there were three girls taking a walk in the mountains. One was a brunette, one was a redhead, and the other was a dumb blonde. They came to a cliff and the brunette said, "If you jump off that cliff and say what you want to be you will become it." So the brunette jumped off and said "falcon" and became a falcon. The redhead jumped off and said "eagle" and became an eagle. The dumb blonde ran, was about to jump, but tripped on a rock, and said "crap."
What do you call a funny mountain?
Hill-arious.
What is more fun than throwing a baby off a cliff?
Catching it with a pitchfork.
Riddle: A man killed his wife in his car with a knife, and no one could see him. He threw the body out of the car and threw the knife off a cliff. When he got home, the cops called the man and told him his wife was dead and to come to the scene of the crime. The man agreed and rushed to the scene. When he got there, the cops immediately arrested him. Why?
ANSWER: The cops never said where the scene of the crime is.
I have a daughter; she’s a fan. Her name is Penny. Fan she was born on the mountain Pen y Fan. I adopted her because her mum fell off the cliff after birthing Penny. It doesn’t matter, really; Penny’s mum wasn’t a big fan of her anyway.
A young boy is stood on the top of a cliff crying. A priest approaches and says, "Why are you crying my son?" "My parents just crashed the car off the cliff and died." "It's just not your day today is it?" Said the priest, unbuttoning his flies.
I bought my blind friend a house on the edge of a cliff.
They died of happiness and a 30 story fall.
If Joe Biden and Kamala Harris jump off a cliff, who survives?
Americans...
What's meaner than taking candy from a baby?
Throwing the baby off a cliff.
What do you call a man with a seagull on his head?
Cliff.
A man asks to play kick the bucket (not death).
The other man agrees. They go to the top of Mt. Everest. The man who asked ties the bucket to the other one's foot. Then he kicks it off the cliff, which brings the man with it. LOL
THE END